Watching the sun go down in Key West is where you wanna be if you’re a tourist (and if I lived there, it’d be where you’d find me each and every evening with my Skinny Pirate in hand).

How does one catch the last of the day’s rays while in Key West?

First, you take a cocktail and grab a bike taxi. Then ogle over the 21-year old Serbian cycling dude while riding down the entire length of Duval Street.

I mean, the hair! The accent! Not to mention an always ready and able ride home from the bars. It may be true love.

Once dropped at Mallory Square (a famous Key West spot folks flock to catch the sunset – complete with street performers), promptly get a cocktail and claim your spot on the dock losing yourself in the moment.

Really, all I was thinking about was are they going to remake The Goonies? (you seriously thought I had serious thoughts? C’mon now!).

But this is how gorgeous the sunset was before I stopped paying attention and wanted a Baby Ruth candy bar after I started thinking about the damn Goonies movie.

Once the sun is truly gone, you will need to take yourself and your cocktail down the pier to absorb all of the street performers. This daring juggler started out with fire….

Flames just weren’t impressive enough, so he added a tomahawk and an ax to the show.

After getting a stomachache watching the young juggler (whose mom thinks he’s in college, by the way), there’s only one other thing to do. Get your palm read.

And let me tell you, nothing will take you from shitfaced to sober in three seconds flat like an Indian man telling you about you and your life. Mr. Mahadeo Jerrybanahan turned my drunk world upside down that night on Duval Street.

When I first sat down, MJ told me I hate (and he said hate) being told what to do (not a shock to anyone who knows me). He went on to say that I’m persuasive (you’re still reading this, right?!), convincing (you should go adopt a cat right now) and people like to be around me (give me some Captain and let’s get this party started!).

The sobering up started when he told me that I really dislike my stomach and have problems with it (I have Celiac’s Disease), I can have kids if I want (immediately making my arm pits perspire – but I’m already a fabulous cat mom!) and I will suffer great heartache (man, why did he have to tell me that?!).

While I was absorbing whatever kind of heart grief could be coming my way, Mr. Jerrybanahan told me that I would have two sources of income by the time I’m 50 and never again have to worry about money (um, I’m wishing this would start any day now) and that ultimately I will have a happy and fun life. Yeehaw!

After all of the life news, the night kinda seemed like this as my blonde, Captain’d up brain was processing the future….

And that my friends is how to sober up (and watch a beautiful sunset) in Key West. My palmist was already dead on about two things that evening – I was happy and having fun.

Cheers!

CBXB